Becoming The Person You Want To Be: The Psychology of Identity-Based Habits
- Trenton Trevillion
- Nov 7
- 3 min read
When we set out to make a change, we often start with the question:
“What do I want to achieve?”
Maybe it’s losing weight, getting in shape, or being more mindful.
But there’s a more powerful question to ask:
“Who do I want to become because of this?”
The Real Reason Most Habits Don’t Stick
For any lasting lifestyle change, mindset is everything. Most people chase results while trying to keep the same mindset and identity they’ve always had.
They rely on motivation, but motivation is fleeting. When it fades (and it always does), the habits fade too.
The hidden lever behind real transformation isn’t more motivation—it’s identity redesign.
When your habits align with who you believe you are, they become part of your natural rhythm instead of another task on your checklist.
“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.” – James Clear
Outcome-Based Habits vs. Identity-Based Habits
Outcome-Based Habits are built around achieving a specific goal or result.
They depend on motivation and short-term focus.
“I want to lose 10 pounds.”
“I want to run a marathon.”
These can be great catalysts for short-term wins—but they rarely last.
Identity-Based Habits, on the other hand, are rooted in who you believe yourself to be.
They align with your values and your standard of living.
“I am someone who moves my body every day.”
“I am someone who nourishes myself with whole, healthy foods.”
When you build from identity, the behavior becomes automatic. You don’t need to convince yourself—you simply act in alignment with who you are.
Identity Drives Behavior (Not Willpower)
What you believe about yourself determines how you show up.
Your brain loves consistency—it wants your actions to match your beliefs.
If you believe, “I’ve always been someone who struggles with routines,” your brain will unconsciously find ways to reinforce that story.
But if you believe, “I am someone who takes care of myself,” your decisions begin to naturally align with that identity.
The beauty is—you can rewrite your beliefs at any time.
How to Shift Your Identity
Ask yourself:
Who do I want to become?
What do I stand for?
How would that version of me live each day?
If you want to be healthier, become someone who prioritizes nourishment and movement.
If you want to be calmer, become someone who protects their peace—through solitude, journaling, or mindful breaks.
Start small. Burnout comes from overcommitting to unrealistic goals.
Instead, design habits that are easy wins and can grow over time.
Examples:
Want to become someone who runs regularly? → Lace up and walk for 5 minutes a day.
Want to eat nourishing foods? → Add one serving of protein to your breakfast.
Want to feel grounded? → Take 60 seconds of deep breathing before logging into work.
Each small action becomes evidence that reinforces your new identity.
Reflect, Refine, and Realign
Just like in business, we don’t launch a plan and walk away—we test, evaluate, and adjust.
Do the same with your habits:
How do they make you feel?
What progress do you notice?
Are they aligned with the person you want to become?
Reflection turns awareness into mastery.
The Identity Shift Statement Exercise
To change your belief system, first identify your limiting belief, then reframe it into your empowering identity statement.
Step 1: Write your current identity belief
“I’ve always been someone who struggles with consistency.”
Step 2: Rewrite it based on who you’re becoming
“I am becoming someone who follows through on what matters most.”
Step 3: Name your anchor habit
“The smallest action that proves this belief true every day.”
(e.g., ‘I make my bed every morning’ or ‘I drink a glass of water before coffee.’)
The key is consistency, not perfection.
You didn’t build your old identity overnight—so give yourself grace as you grow into your new one.
You Get This One Life
You don’t have to wait to “become” the person you want to be.
Start acting like them today—one small decision at a time.
The more evidence you collect, the more that identity becomes your reality.
You’re not just building habits. You’re building who you are.
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